Thursday, April 14, 2011

I'm So Guilty

Today, I woke up and felt great.
Got right into my routine and then it came to abrupt halt.
Today my kid is a SOUR PICKLE! My 13 year old Pickle, derailed my happiness, not my joy.
 I believe that happiness is an emotion, joy is more of a state of being. Therefor, my joy remains in tact. But, I'm not so happy for the moment... You may differ in opinion. You're allowed to. Hahaha.
Any way, he derailed that because he is searching for his identity and boy do I remember that. But I have to say that back when I was searching there were very heavy influences and "Rules to Live by" if you will. That was the climate then.
We had MTV and BET and the Cosby's and Roseanne, Family Matters, Ricki Lake etc... I could fill a book with what we had to influence us. No, not all of them were great influences but it was much easier to see where you fit in or didn't fit in.
Not today, all the lines are blurred and everything is so politically correct. Like anything, this has it's good and it's bad.
For the way that my children are being raised we don't necessarily acknowledge color, but being military we are forced to see rank and status. It's just part of our lives, we do see and pay attention to the way we show up and or allow our kids to show up because it does reflect on our Patriarch.
Well, that 13 year Old Pickle is starting to rebel just a little bit, and I've made my excuses for him, but enough is enough. When I go out and spend good money on good clothes, yes it is partially for the benefit of knowing how people will receive you but it's also for the benefit of helping you to keep your self esteem in tact.
At 13 I don't expect him to get that, but what I do expect is for him to trust that I know what I'm talking about and know that I wouldn't ever intentionally tell him anything to put his physical, mental or emotional self in harms way.
So there will be a compromise, I'll lay his clothes out for him through the rest of the school year and dare him not to dress it what has been put out for him and he'll get to eat, sleep and generally reside in my home until the day comes that he's able to effectively afford to pay for those things himself!
I think that's good.
Fair? Maybe not!
Am I worried about that, No!
I'm guilty, today on April 14th, twenty-eleven of just not giving a flying flip about what my 13 year old wants to wear, because he doesn't know enough about not being governed by his feelings! Sometimes, you just have to do what is expected!

And for this he Will one day "Appreciate this PICKLE!

Don't forget to show some appreciation for a pickle in your travel through life today!


One last thing, The Mayor of New Jersey tweeted this, just this morning  "Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it." William Arthur Ward"
It's not just me people, we have to show our appreciation/ gratitude, it's imperative!

Read me next time!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey Lady,
I so agree with your take on this situation! It is difficult for a 13 year old boy, trying to fit in, trying to find himself among all the crazies that surround him. But....earning freedom to express yourself requires priving that you deserve it. :) Appreciating the things that are provided for you are just a small part of that. And to those who choose to show their hineys in rebellion, I say, "You pay your way, you can make your own decisions." :)
Love ya, Pickle!
PS: Thank you for the gift certificate! I can't wait to use it!